Sometimes staying positive seems like work. I am dedicated to it. Building a new mind through yoga and meditation is intriguing. There are less attachments for me now. I love people more purely. Including myself. But somehow it feels like work once in a while. Tonight. This would be one of those times. A new habit, I guess. Learning to fail and get back up. Seeing mirrors held up to me about who I used to be and who I am now. The truth does make me fill with peace. And power. But not my power. Or my power, but for divine purposes.
One of the best things about the ethical study I have been conducting over the past couple of years, along with the commitment to always telling the truth, regardless, it has made me so much less concerned with what I want in any situation. What I want has gone from the most pleasurable option for me to what is the most ethical, kindest, most in line with divine purpose option. It is a weird place to be. I have such an ego about this, mostly because I am surprised how attractive it is to others. But not because I actually think I am this big deal. It gets lost in translation sometimes, I know. But I have no desire to hurt god's child again. I will allow god's children to have their karma and lessons and consequences. But I have no desire to put my needs before someone else's. It is a good place to be.
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